But I don't want to be a PRINCESS!

But I don't want to be a Princess!!

 

 

Have you ever had this happen:  You are searching or struggling with a decision or idea in your life and then you read something or hear something that really hits home and is SUPER RELEVANT to what is happening to you. Then, suddenly, that message is everywhere...it's in the news, in the sermon at your church, on Oprah (does she still have a show?), in your conversations, in your horoscope.  Is it following you?  It is as if you have a stalker.  Your very own subconscious has become your stalker saying, "I've been here all along!  Are you finally listening?".

 

Well, lately I have been thinking a lot about balance and if and how my work/income benefits my family and enriches my life.  Well, you can't get too far into that line of thinking without addressing the 3 P's...PROFESSION, PRIORITIES, and PURPOSE.  And so, here I am on a Tuesday night - this may be too deep for a Tuesday - but here I am. (I have no choice but to go here because I keep running into the P's!)  I think about work - PROFESSION.  I read books about being a good leader and being productive and I get "what's really important to you" and "101 reasons to prioritize"- PRIORITIES.  And as if that isn't enough subconscious stalking...I get the "how will you make your  mark" from my daily devotional - PURPOSE.  Really?  REALLY?  I just can't even begin to answer that.

 

I feel like I did when Jay was getting Baptised.  The Priest asked me and Michael, "What do you want for your child?"  Julie (my sister and God Mother) said this moment was priceless...she could see my mind racing...what do I want for my child?  Health. Happiness.  Love.  Success...the list goes on!  How do you answer THAT question?  Well, if you are Catholic and at your child's Baptism, the correct answer is "Baptism".  They even tell you the answer beforehand (I never forgot that one again).  But that is how I felt this morning when I read about finding my purpose and making my life count.  In a split second, I felt a rush of excitement and anticipation wash over me like a wave.  And then came the worry and fear that sucked out my breath - the under toe.

 

And so here I am.  9:15 on a Tuesday.  my purpose...my Purpose...MY purpose...MY PURPOSE...

 

UGH!  How can I possibly answer this question?  I'm only just realizing this is my question! 

 

And so I will just say what I am sure Wills would have said in this picture had he been old enough to talk...Today I'm really not so sure about my PURPOSE, but I don't want to be a Princess! 

 

I do know, when I ask myself, "Are we there yet?" I can say, "Not yet, but we are closer than we were yesterday!"