Tuesday, March 1, 2016


Moms Un“wine”d

So here it is…the results we’ve been waiting for!  I have always wanted to be a fly on the wall and been curious about what happens at other peoples' homes around dinner time (and it seems like a bunch of you are curious, too) and now I have some answers and the data to back it up.  For those of you who didn’t see survey, here’s the run down.  Last week I created a survey that asked the participant to answer 5 questions about personal drinking habits…how often, how much, why, etc. I have wondered about this off and on have talked about it with friends and other moms- mostly the morning after we maybe had 1 (or 2) too many.  So finally, I decided to get some real answers…are we alone, or do we just feel like we are alone?  I took the first 100 responses and compiled the data below.  As with any survey results, they are based on the answers that the participants provided and are only as valid as the answers given. Another disclaimer: I am in no way condemning or condoning any of these behaviors.  I am merely sharing my experience and these results. Oh, and one last thing, I am assuming these answers came from 100 women, but I am not completely certain because was is anonymous.

As I suggested earlier, I have often wondered about how much, how often, when, and why other women/moms drink throughout the week. I guess this is partly because I want to be sure I am in the “acceptable” range of what is normal even though I know it doesn’t matter what is right for others if it isn’t right for me.  But the more and more I thought about this, the more I realized up until recently, I haven’t had many conversations with other moms around this topic. In fact, it’s often avoided at all cost. Maybe that is why I became so curious, and maybe that is why I started having these conversations.  One of these conversations in particular pops out in my head and made a big impression on me.  I was talking to a college friend and we were talking about the stress and pressures of everyday life.  As we each added to the list of responsibilities – job, husband, kids, family health issues, finances, aging parents, taking on too much – and on and on I realized something.  Over my adult years, I started as an employee, added being a wife, added child 1, soccer coach, child 2, Treasurer of PTA, business partner, child 3, room mother, student, Professional Coach, child 4… Over the past 20+ years I have continually added responsibilities and activities to my daily life without either 1.) making a conscious plan to remove activities or 2.) creating a plan to deal with the added stress.  This doesn’t start out as that big of a deal when you get married and take on household responsibilities because it is fun and exciting, but as the years, kids, and activities increase it is easy to see how we end up stressed to the max and counting down the minutes until it is 5 o’clock or whatever hour you find respectable to pour that 1st glass of wine or pop open that beer.

Now that we have a little perspective about why/how we got “here”, I’d like to make a few observations about the findings.  All of my statements are based on the information in the survey and are by no means a judgement about the person/persons who chose the answer…I took this survey, too! Also, I am always interested in what you think about things.  So, if you feel compelled to comment on the results, you are certainly welcome as long as your intent is to enhance the conversation and not to judge or hurt another.  One last thing, I am NOT a scientist so how I interpreted these results are solely based on my perceptions.  Thank you again for all of you who participated.  I think the more we can open this topic up to conversation the better for all of us!
 

So without further ado below are my observations and here is the link to the results.  https://www.surveymonkey.com/results/SM-5F8Q932W/


Question 1:

How often you have alcoholic drink/drinks during the week?

3% answered that they don’t drink alcohol.  One of the participants noted that she has been in recovery for 7 years YAY! 

21% of the participants only drink on special occasions (a few of these also answered that they do drink alone in the bathtub.  I also consider that a special occasion when I can take a bath alone!!)

13% only drink on the weekends.

34% a few nights a week.

13% every night (one participant noted that she drinks one glass of red wine per night for the health benefits).

16% drink alcohol most nights.

Question 2:

Why do you drink alcohol? Check all that apply.

The #1 answer with 81% was to Unwind.  I think I also answered that as one of my reasons.  While I find that it seems to help in the moment, it also adds to my need to unwind either when I have a bad night sleep or feel guilty for that extra beer I didn’t need or really want.

62% like the taste

58% drink to socialize

30% when stressed

13% it’s a habit

3% don’t know why

 

Question #3

Do you ever drink by yourself?

33% sometimes

29% yes

19% never

16% I’m NEVER alone

I think it's interesting to note that over 60% of the participants answered that they do have alcohol on some occasions when they are alone.  As a mom, I find it a treat to relax by myself with a beer or glass of wine.  Before this was taboo to admit you drink alone, but these days, I consider this more of an act of self care when done in moderation.  And those 16% of mamas who are never alone...I feel your pain! 
 
Question #4

Do you ever think you may drink too much?

33% yes

54% no

11% I don’t know

I'm not sure what results I expected to see with this question.  I answered yes to this question but for whatever reason, I thought there would be fewer to answer yes or I don't know.  It is so interesting to me close to 50% of the people think they may drink too much, but people rarely openly talk about it.  I'm not saying that I think that 50% of moms have drinking problems, but if that many of us drink when stressed, to unwind, or as a habit maybe if we talk more about how we got to this place we can find other healthy ways to get through the "witching hour" or at least own it without shame or guilt.

Question #5

How many kids do you have?

The answers here ranged from 0-5 kids and while I wondered if there would be a correlation between the number of kids and frequency or amount of drinking, I did not find that in the results.   
Thanks again for your honesty and participation!